How does family mediation work?

Simplified steps in family mediation

You can seek legal advice at any stage in the mediation process.

Initial assessment

A separate, confidential meeting will take place with each of you to explain in more detail what mediation is and how it works. This meeting enables you to ask questions freely about the process and ensure that you understand what it is before you decide whether to proceed. In some cases it may be more convenient to have these meetings on the phone, in which case you would then be seen briefly before the first mediation.
You will have the opportunity to explain what the issues are for each of you and your family so that a view can be taken as to whether mediation is the most appropriate way forward. You will be assessed to see if you are eligible for free mediation. If you are not, the costs of mediation will be explained to you. Provided mediation is suitable and you both wish to proceed, a mediation session will then be arranged at a time that suits you both.

First and subsequent mediation sessions

You will both need to attend this meeting and generally you will be sitting together in the same room. If you prefer to sit in separate rooms, suitable arrangements will be made so that this is possible.
During the first session, you both decide what issues you would like to resolve in mediation. This becomes your agenda. During the first and subsequent mediation sessions relevant information will be gathered to enable you both to make informed decisions, whether relating to finances, your children or other issues.
You will explore options together, to enable you both to decide which options would give you and your family the most satisfactory and long lasting solutions.
With regards to your children, it is not unusual to struggle with parenting after a relationship has broken down. Parenting is challenging at the best of times. Parenting effectively after separation can present new, sometimes tougher challenges than before. During the mediation, you will discuss and find positive ways of dealing with these challenges together, to ensure that your children make this transition with you, with the minimum of distress. Any arrangements that are made in respect of children should focus on the children as individuals ensuring whenever possible, that their needs and concerns can be met.
With regards to finances, the process of gathering financial information can feel daunting. You will be helped in doing this as effectively and quickly as possible. Confusion can be clarified, misunderstandings can be explained and legal information can be provided where necessary. Having explored the possible options you will work towards finding a solution that can work for each of you and the family.

Final session

Once you have addressed what is important to you both and to your children and reached joint decisions about how you wish to resolve any parenting or financial issues, your decisions will be incorporated into a formal document for you to retain. As the discussions in mediation are confidential, they are not legally binding on you.
The formal document will enable you to take further legal advice should it be appropriate or should you wish to do so. In some circumstances, for example, when resolving financial arrangements as part of a divorce, it is recommended that you ask your independent legal advisors to incorporate your decisions into a document that can then be put to the Court to make your decisions legally binding. This will be discussed with you fully during mediation.

Testimonials

The mediations sessions that my husband and I received helped us enormously to discuss in an amicable way our finances going forward in our divorce and therefore reaching a settlement amicably. The sessions we received via zoom worked extremely well especially as my husband was then living abroad enabling us to carry on with the process in a manner which didn't instigate relationship tensions which both parties felt developed during negotiations with our respective solicitors.

Adrienne remained professional and sensitive to the upset and trauma that divorce can cause to either party. I felt that her mediation was clear, time efficient and with the ability to diffuse situations which at times became heated in a gentle but controlled manner.

I would most certainly have no hesitation in recommending Adrienne to anyone who unfortunately finds themselves going through a divorce. I would like to add that mediation not only saved my husband and I most certainly large solicitor fees but more than this it has enabled us to separate in an amicable way which at one time felt impossible. After 11 years of marriage this has been a gift in order to remember the good that we had together and not to be bitter because of the nature of the divorce process.

I can't fully express really just how helpful, reassuring and supportive I found working with you to be. You helped me to find a way through such difficult discussions and decisions at such a confusing and vulnerable time. Thank you so very much.

I was really pleased with it. I felt comfortable that we were going through things with a level headed, tactful guide.

I cannot think of any way to improve your service. It was especially tricky through lockdown and the fact that we were able to keep meeting in a safe, supportive and productive way was amazing.

Mediation with you exceeded my expectations. Having had several sessions with a different mediation service, I was apprehensive and actually pretty fearful of how the process would leave me feeling. You always made me feel reassured and I felt that our family was in good hands. Your calm and sensitive approach, along with your considerable expertise was invaluable and I so appreciated your honesty and objectivity. I always felt listened to and that the whole experience was impartial and balanced, with the welfare of the girls at the centre of everything. I would have been happy and confident for you to meet with the girls had we reached that point, knowing that you would be sensitive to them and their needs too.

Thank you so much for all your help and advice. I have found the experience invaluable and still often refer back to some of the things we talked about to guide my decisions and actions.

You were very helpful and approachable and fair. You kept us on track when conversations went off on a tangent & allowed us to reach a satisfactory conclusion.

I would highly recommend Adrienne Cox for any couple who is going through a divorce ( and especially where a young child is involved as was in our situation ). Adrienne is very professional, highly skilled and knowledgeable.

It has been a long road with many ups and downs between myself and my husband but Adrienne has always remained very professional, neutral and very patient. We got there in the end, thanks to Adrienne,with an amicable, healthy relationship between ourselves which is the best outcome possible for our Son and a clearer future for us all.

I was very impressed with your professional service and the way the sessions were conducted in a calm and understanding environment.

I am satisfied and convinced that I couldn't have found a more competent, professional and sympathetic mediator and mediation service than that offered by yourself and your mediation service.

Just to let you know that the consent order has now been approved, the house transferred and the decree of absolute through, so all done and dusted thanks to mediation.

I didn't know what to expect having never been through it before but was very satisfied with your service. I really didn't know where to turn but your service really helped me.

The client reported that the mediation with you was really good. You were understanding but firm and he said he thought they had all come away from mediation feeling progress had been made with them all having compromised.