Frequently asked questions

Can mediation help you even though you may not have physically separated yet?

Yes. Mediation can help couples even if they have not physically separated. It can help from the moment you have decided that you are going to separate. Mediation can help whether the separation is recent or a long time ago, whether there has been court involvement or not and whether there has been solicitor involvement or not.

Can we still come to mediation even though we can’t speak to each other?

Yes. Mediation can help you reach decisions even if you are sitting in separate rooms. The skills that the mediator uses will help you to look at ways of improving your communication if you wish to do so. If you do not wish to do so, the mediator will work with you and help you both to make decisions regardless of how well you can speak to each other.

Can you, as a mediator, give legal advice?

No. Although I have in the past been a family law solicitor, and am therefore aware of how the law works in this area, giving advice would mean that I am no longer impartial. I recommend that alongside mediation, you each seek independent legal advice.

Can we turn our decisions into a legally binding document?

Yes. I will discuss this with you when we meet and explain to you what would need to happen to make your agreement legally binding.

Can you see our children as part of the mediation?

Yes. I am qualified to consult directly with children in mediation and am DBS approved. If you feel that it would be helpful to your children for me to speak to them, and your children wish to see me, I can discuss this with you in greater detail.

How many times do we need to see you?

Mediation is a very personal and flexible process. How often you attend will depend on the issues that you wish/need to discuss. On average, if you need to resolve both the financial aspects of your separation and put in place workable arrangements for your children, you may need 3 – 5 sessions.

How long do the sessions last?

The sessions last on average 1½ hours. If you wish to have a longer or shorter session, then the process will fit according to your needs and priorities.

How much does it cost?

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Do you send us any paperwork?

In addition to the letters required to make arrangements for the meetings (for which there is no charge), I will prepare a summary of the discussions after each mediation session, unless you specifically ask me not to do so. I can then send a copy of this to your solicitor if you have one, to keep them informed of progress. If you are discussing finances, I will prepare a Financial Summary, which summarises all your financial information in a joint document. I will also prepare a Memorandum of Understanding which records the final outcome of the mediation, including all the final decisions that you both make.

Testimonials

The mediations sessions that my husband and I received helped us enormously to discuss in an amicable way our finances going forward in our divorce and therefore reaching a settlement amicably. The sessions we received via zoom worked extremely well especially as my husband was then living abroad enabling us to carry on with the process in a manner which didn't instigate relationship tensions which both parties felt developed during negotiations with our respective solicitors.

Adrienne remained professional and sensitive to the upset and trauma that divorce can cause to either party. I felt that her mediation was clear, time efficient and with the ability to diffuse situations which at times became heated in a gentle but controlled manner.

I would most certainly have no hesitation in recommending Adrienne to anyone who unfortunately finds themselves going through a divorce. I would like to add that mediation not only saved my husband and I most certainly large solicitor fees but more than this it has enabled us to separate in an amicable way which at one time felt impossible. After 11 years of marriage this has been a gift in order to remember the good that we had together and not to be bitter because of the nature of the divorce process.

I can't fully express really just how helpful, reassuring and supportive I found working with you to be. You helped me to find a way through such difficult discussions and decisions at such a confusing and vulnerable time. Thank you so very much.

I was really pleased with it. I felt comfortable that we were going through things with a level headed, tactful guide.

I cannot think of any way to improve your service. It was especially tricky through lockdown and the fact that we were able to keep meeting in a safe, supportive and productive way was amazing.

Mediation with you exceeded my expectations. Having had several sessions with a different mediation service, I was apprehensive and actually pretty fearful of how the process would leave me feeling. You always made me feel reassured and I felt that our family was in good hands. Your calm and sensitive approach, along with your considerable expertise was invaluable and I so appreciated your honesty and objectivity. I always felt listened to and that the whole experience was impartial and balanced, with the welfare of the girls at the centre of everything. I would have been happy and confident for you to meet with the girls had we reached that point, knowing that you would be sensitive to them and their needs too.

Thank you so much for all your help and advice. I have found the experience invaluable and still often refer back to some of the things we talked about to guide my decisions and actions.

You were very helpful and approachable and fair. You kept us on track when conversations went off on a tangent & allowed us to reach a satisfactory conclusion.

I would highly recommend Adrienne Cox for any couple who is going through a divorce ( and especially where a young child is involved as was in our situation ). Adrienne is very professional, highly skilled and knowledgeable.

It has been a long road with many ups and downs between myself and my husband but Adrienne has always remained very professional, neutral and very patient. We got there in the end, thanks to Adrienne,with an amicable, healthy relationship between ourselves which is the best outcome possible for our Son and a clearer future for us all.

I was very impressed with your professional service and the way the sessions were conducted in a calm and understanding environment.

I am satisfied and convinced that I couldn't have found a more competent, professional and sympathetic mediator and mediation service than that offered by yourself and your mediation service.

Just to let you know that the consent order has now been approved, the house transferred and the decree of absolute through, so all done and dusted thanks to mediation.

I didn't know what to expect having never been through it before but was very satisfied with your service. I really didn't know where to turn but your service really helped me.

The client reported that the mediation with you was really good. You were understanding but firm and he said he thought they had all come away from mediation feeling progress had been made with them all having compromised.