Frequently asked questions
Can mediation help you even though you may not have physically separated yet?
Yes. Mediation can help couples even if they have not physically separated. It can help from the moment you have decided that you are going to separate. Mediation can help whether the separation is recent or a long time ago, whether there has been court involvement or not and whether there has been solicitor involvement or not.
Can we still come to mediation even though we can’t speak to each other?
Yes. Mediation can help you reach decisions even if you are sitting in separate rooms. The skills that the mediator uses will help you to look at ways of improving your communication if you wish to do so. If you do not wish to do so, the mediator will work with you and help you both to make decisions regardless of how well you can speak to each other.
Can you, as a mediator, give legal advice?
No. Although I have in the past been a family law solicitor, and am therefore aware of how the law works in this area, giving advice would mean that I am no longer impartial. I recommend that alongside mediation, you each seek independent legal advice.
Can we turn our decisions into a legally binding document?
Yes. I will discuss this with you when we meet and explain to you what would need to happen to make your agreement legally binding.
Can you see our children as part of the mediation?
Yes. I am qualified to consult directly with children in mediation and am DBS approved. If you feel that it would be helpful to your children for me to speak to them, and your children wish to see me, I can discuss this with you in greater detail.
How many times do we need to see you?
Mediation is a very personal and flexible process. How often you attend will depend on the issues that you wish/need to discuss. On average, if you need to resolve both the financial aspects of your separation and put in place workable arrangements for your children, you may need 3 – 5 sessions.
How long do the sessions last?
The sessions last on average 1½ hours. If you wish to have a longer or shorter session, then the process will fit according to your needs and priorities.
How much does it cost?
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Do you send us any paperwork?
In addition to the letters required to make arrangements for the meetings (for which there is no charge), I will prepare a summary of the discussions after each mediation session, unless you specifically ask me not to do so. I can then send a copy of this to your solicitor if you have one, to keep them informed of progress. If you are discussing finances, I will prepare a Financial Summary, which summarises all your financial information in a joint document. I will also prepare a Memorandum of Understanding which records the final outcome of the mediation, including all the final decisions that you both make.